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Top Chef + Just Desserts

23 Sep

Typically, I don’t have much love for the reunion show. However, last night’s Top Chef DC gathering had a few moments worth celebrating. My favorite  happened during the Judges Gone Wild segment in which we were all treated to Tom, Padma and the crew killing time. At judges’ table, Padma asked, “Who do we want to send home?” And then Tom raised his hand looking very sullen and a little hopeful. Awesome.

And I’m super excited about Top Chef All Stars! Hello Fabio, I have missed you! I am eagerly awaiting a new round of quotes. Though he is best known for “This is Top Chef, not Top Scallop,” my favorite (so far) was when Tom dissed his dish and Fabio said something like, “My grandmother, she would be so disappointed in you.”

And regarding Just Desserts … UGH. Gail is nice. There’s just too much emphasis on the personal drama. I feel bad for that Seth guy, really. But he’s annoying and creepy. And how could they send Tim home? He’s like the Nathan Lane character in the Birdcage. So cute and nice. I will probably keep watching, but I will regret it.

Fawning.

12 Aug
Peregrine Honig's Fawns

I sorta can't believe how awesome this piece by Peregrine Honig is.

I haven’t totally been following Bravo’s latest Project Runway knockoff, Work of Art – The Next Great Artist but the few times I have seen it, I’ve been pleasantly surprised. The critiques and artists’ statements can be totally affected and cliche, and the fake Tim Gunn seems to be there solely for his accent, but overall, the work is interesting. And last night’s finale was really good.

While she didn’t win, Peregrine Honig of the wacky hats, cotton candy and horn-playing husband, totally captured my heart—and everyone else’s—with the above piece and her lovely demeanor.

One great thing about the finale? All of the contestants seemed genuine, kind and supportive of one another. I don’t think I heard the phrase “throw under the bus” even once. I wish I never had to hear those words in the same sentence ever again, but I digress.

Kudos to Bravo for this one.

New Lows

10 Aug

I’m ashamed. Not only did I gleefully watch The Bachelor Pad, I watched that Dating In the Dark Show (I won’t justify its existence with a link). I hate you ABC.

Regarding The Pad: Elizabeth needs to dye her hair back and stop talking. Does the Weatherman realize that his official ABC name is actually “The Weatherman?” The bunk beds are totally ridiculous. Michelle: Oy. Is Tenley for real or just super sneaky?

Pea-leeze: Top Chef DC

30 Jul

Despite the fact that I think cooking is best left to my friends at Sultan‘s Market and Trader Joe’s, I love some Top Chef! But this season is kinda losing me. I’m into the DC idea (Hail to the Chef = awesome), but totally bracing myself for the inevitable, painfully lame crossover with The Real Housewives of DC.

My biggest problem with this season can be explained by taking a look at this week’s episode in which Alex allegedly steals a pea puree from Ed and goes on to win the challenge. In the episode all of the chefs are talking about this constantly but no one does anything. And, as Tom points out on his blog, Ed never directly accuses Alex. Fine. But isn’t this a reality TV show? Our blogging judge goes on to write that we will never know what happened. Why not? Aren’t there cameras all over the place? Can’t someone go back and check the footage? If we can’t count on a reality show to capture what actually happens—especially when it’s a contest-based show and the winner may have cheated—why bother?

Also, one of the things I have historically liked about Top Chef is that the show usually steers clear of showing us too much of life in the house—we’re left to judge people on how they behave in the kitchen. So, I hate that there’s all this speculation about Tiffani and Ed. 1. Who cares? 2. If there was proof, I bet we’d see it. Sex is more interesting than peas and they were all over it a few seasons back with Leah and Hosea.

And finally, is it me or  is Padma extra bitchy this year? During the elimination as Andrea was saying goodbye I swear Padma said something like, “Okay, that’s enough. Goodbye.”Simply not nice.

What the L?

29 Jul

Any Real L Word watchers out there? I have been dying to see this show, but due to cost-cutting, I no longer have Showtime. Are these ladies a worthy investment or just a poor girl’s Shane?

And speaking of Shane, how about Katherine Moenning as Lisbeth Salander in the American version of The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo?

Right?!

……..In the immortal words of Brandon De Wilde (and what an awesome drag king name that would be), “Shane! come back!”

My Summer Home

27 Jul

Oh Big Brother – I don’t know what your secret formula is, but you suck me in every single summer. I forget about you completely once you’re over, but the second that first commercial is aired in late-May, I can’t wait for you to start.

Now, having watched all 11 previous seasons I know what’s in store: stock characters, stock dialogue, challenges that must have been designed by either a super-genius or a ten-year-old (and possibly both), the Chenbot. And yet, I eagerly await the first episode that always begins with a mad dash for a bed, and then all 3 (3!) hours a week of the set em up, knock em down formula that is the Head of Household competition, Nomination ceremony, Veto competition, Eviction cycle.

This year I’ve been rewarded for my faithfulness with a cast that includes a screeching chemist, a deranged local sheriff, Big Brother’s version of Jersey Shore-dom, more breasts than you can shake a stick at, and all of the oh-so-pretty men who seem to be lining up to shake their own sticks at those breasts. This season we’re being treated to not one, but two, showmances and the show has been on for just over 2 weeks. My guess is the BB pixelation budget is going to be busted before the summer is half over, though the houseguests seem to have mastered the use of blankets, finally.

And could it be true? Has motherhood loosened up the Chetbot? Gone is the stick figure and even tinier outfits – not only does she look fabulous but she seems to have found a personality. May the same hold true for my favorite cardboard cut-out of a show.

We’re not dumb, we just act that way on Mondays.

21 Jul

Welcome to Smart Ladies, Bad TV!

We are a collective of intelligent women who watch totally stupid programs (or “stories”). And while we may not believe that a stint on a reality TV show is the way to true love, we don’t watch ironically. We love this shit. We especially love Dancing with the Stars and the Bachelor franchise. From now on, all of the Bachelor-related shows will simply be referred to as The Bach. But on second thought, The Bachelor Pad has to be called the Pad…. Anyway, if you’re reading this, you’ll probably know which one we’re talking about.

We have had some unproven theories (and great spin-off ideas) over the years (though we could have done without the Jake DWTS/Bach crossover): Jason was actually supposed to be on a TLC/ABC crossover show called Little Bachelor (and did anyone else forget that he and Molly got married?).  Bret Michaels will be the next Bachelor—building on the lame ass “On the Wings of Love” season, The Smart Ladies present “Every Rose Has Its Thorn.”

So, after much wine and many vegetarian entrees (aka: sea salt brownies from trader Joe’s), we thought, why keep these nuggets to ourselves? With that, we bring you this blog—just in time for the most dramatic season finale EVER!

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