Okay, my head exploded last week when the Bachelor got all Elvis-y! Everyone knows I love Elvis and have certain theories about my own past life as the King, so despite my growing hatred for this season of the most dramatic show on television, I was enchanted.
Brad took the Ashleys to Viva Elvis (lucky bitches!)—but wait, they were there to be IN the show, not the audience. Oh ABC…never saw that coming. Anyway, dumb people talked about dumb things, he picked the Ashley with the larger forehead and then they were suspended over the crowd as “Are You Lonesome Tonight?” played. But it looked like she was wearing air mail, indicating that “Return to Sender” would have been the more appropriate song. But then Brad was sort of done up military style (post Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell—did you see that eyeliner!) so maybe the mail dress was to indicate distance. But I digress.
The highlight of the season: cutting to the rejected Ashley crying in the cab (what happened to the limo? Did that funeral director girl blow the budget for the episode buying that ugly bag at Fendi?) while, “Are You Lonesome Tonight?” played in the background. Hilarious.
I don’t have much love for this season, the girls are lame and Womack is vapid on his best days. But I will give ABC kudos for the Vegas episode. Prediction for tonight: we finally figure out who Jackie is.
I need to take a moment to express my total excitement for The Chicago Code, which starts tonight on Fox. Not only was part of it filmed on my old block (we got police notices telling us not to be alarmed about random gunfire which was pretty cool), it stars my girlfriend Jennifer Beals.